hard to tell, but between the first pic on this blog, and this pic (not a great shot of me, i'm aware...no makeup, not standing straight, don't have a great bra on...i just don't care these days) i have lost about 40 lbs. between the lost 20lbs prior to my surgery, and today, my total loss is almost 60 lbs. not that i care, honestly. i'm exhausted, and tired of being sick and tired. spent yesterday in the hospital getting more IV fluids, same as friday. i feel better today, but i'm holding my breath because i've felt this way before only to slide back into misery in a day. so...i'm not counting my chickens.
i am angry with the tv because it is filling my head hunger. all the stouffer's and lean cuisine ads for their chicken asiago panini's (which i've loved for like a year) as well as tyson chicken strips ads, and the new pizza hut ads with dipping sauce pizza (CHRIST, satan is out to get me, i swear) is making me absolutely crazy. i'm not an idiot. i know those things are part of what got me here today. but being here today, i don't CARE about the weight loss. i wish i hadn't done it and could live a normal life. do you know i haven't had anything but liquids pass these lips (except for a few dry stray cheerios) for 5 weeks???? anyone who thinks this surgery is the easy way out is out of their mind.
