Sunday, April 13, 2008

more pictures

this is me and ian, my mom's 3 yr old bi-colored ragdoll. sorry about the redeye for both of us. ian has gorgeous deep turquoise eyes. me? just green.

ridiculous grin, and my arms look big here, but that's just the sleeve. doesn't show off the waist, but it isn't a great pic.

strained goofy smile for the camera. see how much i love getting pictures taken? LOL

broke down, took pictures

i didn't like doing it, but i think it was necessary. so, here are some pictures.

first the old me,

and now, the new me!

and the new me with a forced cheesy smile

me and sophie, my mom's 2 yr old balinese


i am not fond of photos of myself, but...i don't want to throw up when i see them, anymore.

went to the outlet stores in grove city with my mom on friday for several hours. almost cleared out j crew, eddie bauer, and liz claiborne. :) that was fun. well...i hate shopping, but it was fun buying new clothes that look nice on me and that were a size smaller than i expected to be wearing, in all 3 stores. oh, and i walked into liz claiborne woman - and they chased me out with a "you know, this is a plus-size woman's store, you can find the regular liz claiborne store around the corner. " heh heh!

also, saw an old friend on friday night. make that an old boyfriend. blew his mind ;)

that was also good for the soul.

Wednesday, April 2, 2008

It's All About The Clothes

i've been resisting buying new clothes. last time i did, it was the end of december, and i had been wearing all my size 24 clothes up until then - which would not do for my trip to FLA with the MIL. i needed decent things to wear in public that weren't falling off my body. i also didn't want to spend a lot of money, as these items would soon be outgrown, too. so, since about that time, i've lost probably another 45 lbs or so. these newest items were starting to look huge and ridiculous on me. it's tough, because i only have between 20 or 25 lbs to go, and i don't want to spend much as the same thing will happen once i reach goal - everything will be too big. but, alas, i need to find a few things that fit that i can wear out in public and not look ridiculous.

my idea right now, since it is spring, yet still cold where i live, was to get a pair of jeans, and a jean jacket perhaps. the tops i have i can still wear under the jean jacket even if they're a little big. and maybe i'll pick up one or two lightweight tops for spring - summer as well. we'll see.

this weekend, hank and i went to a little swanky shopping area to check out some fashion. in this area were Ann Taylor Loft, Chicos, something called Black Market White Something (looks like all the clothes are black and/or white) Talbots and Coldwater Creek. i've ordered stuff from CC before and liked the quality. However...walking into this store was an eyeopener. every person in there was well over 50, except for the employees. i did see 2 things i liked - but they were A) too fancy for my lifestyle right now and B)very, very spendy. so, we backed out of that store and moved on. makes no sense to buy something that expensive if i'm only going to be able to wear it for a couple more months. On to the other stores. Looked in the window at the B/W store - meh. not enough of a draw to get me to go in. and Chicos looked like a lot of cruisewear or something, so i didn't go in there, either. i didn't even look at talbots - because, growing up i always associated talbots with my mom, or with women in the workforce. i am not that right now, so i'm not going in. that left the Ann Taylor Loft. i had high hopes. but...meh. it wasn't the same as a regular Ann Taylor store. nothing except black patent leather flip flops caught my eye.

here's the thing. i'm going to be 40. i'm all about looking age appropriate. i find it a little sad when women don't pay attention to that and shop in the Juniors department after age 30 whether or not they can fit in those clothes. i mean...c'mon, who are you fooling? no one. and you end up looking ridiculous and people are sad for you. so. i looked around at all the women shopping...and they were all in their 50s or 60s. ok. i'm only a decade off, but...is THIS what is age appropriate for me?? it made me a little sad. i'm all for preppiness and classic classy clothing. but, is this my demographic now?? i'm thinking it doesn't have to be. i identify more with the J.Jill clothing and who they're marketing to as well as JCrew and Eddie Bauer. Even Nordstroms, which we dont have nearby. sigh...it's all so complicated. when did this get complicated??

add to that that i don't know what size i am. and yeah, i realize it varies from manufacturer to manufacturer, but still. i believe i'm a 16 in pants and a 14 in tops. and they say always dress the biggest part of you (which now is a little paunch on my midsection and hip area. used to be my boobs were the largest part, well, as well as my ass, but...no more!) but it is complicated. if i'm in the misses department (which i think is age appropriate, i think. according to my friend in the business) i would be probably wearing an 18 on bottom, 16 on top. but if i'm in the women's department, i'm either a 1x, or a 16W on bottom, 14W on top. WHY?? can't things just be the same sizing across the board?? why must it be so difficult to understand (well, maybe not for everyone, but it is for me!)

in the meantime, yesterday i went to Sears. yes, Sears. specifically looking for levi jeans for women. and, i found them!!! i haven't been able to get into levis since high school - and i have a bit of snootery (made that up - it means snooty, but as a noun) that levis are the only jeans to wear or else you're not cool. it was like that in high school, and since then, i still believe it. LOL. anyhoo - i love them. i'd have loved them more if they were an even darker wash...but they're ok. medium wash, slight stretch in the fabric, with a bit of a crosshatch texture/pattern to them and NOT any of that gross yellow treatment on jeans that you see these days - i think it makes them look dirty and it grosses me out. so these are medium rise, medium length, medium wash jeans...(boy levis has changed in 20 yrs. didn't have all these options back then!) they're not the skinny jeans or tapered jeans. just a slight boot cut, nice line for the leg. and i'm absolutely thrilled. i took 2 pair in the dressing room not knowing which size would fit me, and i put on the smaller size first - and voila! those are the jeans i left the store with!! :) yay me!! not saying what size - but take my word for it, i haven't seen this size in over 20 yrs, either! it was tough to leave sears because they were having this great sale on what seemed to be every item of clothing in every department 60% off already marked down prices. i left with the jeans and one top that turned out to be $10. i could have done some serious damage there, but i restrained myself. plus, i was so excited about the jeans i couldn't wait to get home to put them on!! when H came home, i put them on for him and he nearly cried. (he's emotional about my weightloss and has been my biggest supporter aside from my mom) he kept asking me to turn around so he could see the back. and he said to me "oh my god! my wife has a nice ass!!! look at that!" LOL, too funny.

my mom and i are going to the grove city outlets next friday to check out some clothes, see what kind of deals i can find. i can't wait.